Friday, October 14, 2005

My life, my life, my life, my life...IN THE SUNSHINE

Okay, I've neglected the blog...I'm sorry. Man, it's been a month and a half and a (please choose based on your region: BUNCHA, BUTTLOAD, HELLA, HEAPA, TALL ORDER) of titmes have went down...so I'll surmise the best I can with ten topics going on in my life...well okay ten topics that i MUST comment on

Major League Baseball Post Season

If I told you once, I'll tell you again...Cardinalnation, this is OUR year. Our batting lineup isn't as strong as last years, but we are definitely guaranteed to get on base and bring in some runs. Our starting rotation is good. Carpenter, Mulder, Morris & Supan. Our defense is the best in the league...our bullpen is and will remain suspect. As long as our pitchers can go 7+ innings, I love our chances.

This time of year is also fun if you live in Texas. As you know, Texas breathes football (since their professional baseball squads range from "suck to decent". So in mid October ppl in TX suddenly get behind the Astros. The funny thing is, they can't name 2 ppl who don't pitch for the Astros...because EVERYBODY KNOWNS ROGER CLEMMENS. wtf??

Like being a Red Sox fan, cheering for the Astros in October is also a seasonal fad.

Lastly, Jose' Molina did in fact trap that ball in game 2 of the ALCS. The question is, why did the home plate umpire allow Prizeinski (sp?) to take first base, if the umpire rung him out...


"Hustler"

Some comedian a couple of years ago told a joke regarding the digression of HipHop music. Primarily "we've gone from wanting to bang, to pimps to huslters." Last time I checked, the person who was successful at all 3 of these challenged the Nation of Islam regarding their beliefs as "Muslims", this same cat got shot point blank in the chest after someone kindly asked his neighbor to remove "...your hands out of my pocket".

Speaking of hustlers, I got duped by the cute kid scheme on Thursday. I was going grocery shopping in my neighborhood Albertson's. At both of the doors there was an adult and a two little snotty nosed kids. Of course the kids were doing all of the talking trying to move what appeared to be those expensive ass $3 candy bars for something. I saw them, and quickly got behind a mom with some bad kids and rushed into the store. Safe right? Wrong.

Leaving the store, one of the snotty nosed kids ran up on this chick and offered his sob story. (Mental note: snotty nosed kids who don't look you directly in the face and barely speak above a whisper is NICE strategy...but I digress). The chick didn't have any money and walked off. Don't ask me why, but I felt bad for these kids...and was like "eff it I'll give you my $2 and help your "cause" "

"I got you little man" I said... "How much?"

"EIGHT DOLLARS". At this point, I"m like WTF? I already committed to this kid, and his pops looks like he just got cut from the practice squad of the Dallas Cowboys. Fortunately, I had 7 singles on me, and paid the kid. what made matters worse, is he had peanut brittle (a personal favorite of fat Albert) and some taffy (Not to be confused w/ that wack song that's dominating urban radio these days). I chose to stick w/ my allegiance to Dr. William H. Cosby (we share the same bday afterall) and got the Peanut Brittle.

Madden 06

My buddy just started up a double elimination Madden tournament this week. After the first round, I'm already in the loser's bracket. I run w/ the Panthers, and I played against the Ravens. I have to credit EA Sports more and more every day...because "if it's in the game, it's in the game" The Ravens defense was EXCELLENT, Jamal Lewis carries that team, and the passing game is effective enough to sustain their drives. If anyone has any tips for me as to how to beat the Ravens...holla @ me

I was upset that I lost, so I jumped back on line and played this "kid" in a late night game of Madden. I was confused b/c it took the kid 5 minutes from accepting my invitation to actually start the game (avg wait time 48 seconds). After the first quarter was over (he was up 10-7). I realized how noticeably fast Deon Branch, Bethel Johnson, Corey Dillon and Kevin Faulk had become. Also, Tom Brady could literally see the whole field (those of you who have played Madden this year can appreciate the ridiculousness of that attribute). I wound up winning 35-31, and was like "dude you suck...you had to use a code, and you STILL lost??" ahh redepmption...it's sweet!!

Diddy

Sean, I just find it interesting that the two members you picked from the season 2 (Babs & Ness) are on the mixtape circuit; yet Choppa has a video? And your "underground down south super group" is ready to disban to the rising success of Jeezy! Now, you have another season of Making the Band on MTV....Sean, QUIT MAKING BANDS


Harriet Miers

Bush 43's latest choice of supreme court justice nominee has an impressive resume:

Hillcrest high School graduate 1963 (think elite high school district)
BS SMU 1967
JD SMU, School of Law (1970)

Experience:

Feb 05-present White House Counsel
2003-2004: White House deputy chief of staff for policy
2001-2003: White House staff secretary
1995-2000: Texas lottery Commission-chairwoman
1972-2000: private law practice
1992-1993: State Bar of Texas- President
1989-1991: Dallas City council City member-member;
1985: Dallas Bar Association- President

But she's never been a judge???

Wow, well on one hand you gotta be happy that Bush 43 picked a woman. But she's never been a judge?? It is reported that she was a strong contributor to Al Sharpton's campaign. But she's never been a judge?

This in addition to the fact that conservatives aren't sure if she's conservative enough, and liberals aren't sure if she's liberal enough

Insert the phrase "Compassionate Consevative"...

Stay tuned boys and girls, this will get even better!!

Subway bombings?

last weekend (Oct 8-11) the United States was under high alert in the NYC due to an Al Queda posting of a possible subway attack. Only later to find out that the whole thing was a hoax?? My man had this theory (and I agreed) that the bomb scare was so that the news networks could take focus off of Katrina/Rita victims...

The Wizard of Wooden
Wow, John Wooden is 95??? damn

Dave Chappelle as Prince

The Chapelle Show skit where Charlie Murphy told the true hollywood story of him hangin' w/ Prince is easily one of my favorites! Don't get it twisted, I loved the Rick James skit also, it's just that when you hear everyday people who are not funny say "I'm Rick James Bitch", it's just no longer funny. PLUS fewer ppl can quote the Prince skit, so in my opinion (IMO in case you see this acronym again) makes it more classic....I digress. Well, cleary some members of the Minnesota football Vikings also

For those of you not in the know, the Vikings suck! I should know, I have Daunte Culpepper as one of my QBs in one of my 3 fantasy leagues (don't ask, every year I always say I'm only going to do one). But last week, someone leaked a story that said some members of the Vikings rented some "party boats" and took a cruise on the Lake Minnetonka. Nothing wrong w/ that right? Well, allegedley all throughout this boats there were various acts of oral sex being performed on the boat (yes, there were women on this boat also...slow down).

Now, I'll be honest...I don't have a big problem w/ this...as I'm sure this is in no way an "original idea". But it's unfortunate that it had to happen to team that went into the 2005 NFL season with the label "Team that made the dumbest trade in the off season", and the fact that they suck...now they gotta deal with this. What does this have to w/ Dave Chappelle?

Well one of my favorite lines in the Prince skit was a response to Donnell Rollilngs (b/k/a Ashy Larry) when Donnell asked "Hey Prince, ca..can I have something to drink?" Prince's response:

"Why don't you purify yourself in the waters of Lake Minnetonka" (as he proceeds to drive past Donnell for a hoop).

Okay, when you first hear it it's not that funny...but think about it...you'll find yourself leading a conference call and just laughing hysterically after that line...or as James Earl Jones as King Jahari-Jofur (from Coming To America) once said "I know I do!"


The Negro Leagues

Man, why is it everytime I hear Buck O'Neil (Legendary Negro League baseball figure, and chairman of the Negro League museum in Kansas City, MO) I have to stop and listen? This man is probably the greatest story teller alive...oh yea, he's also 93.

Fall TV Season

Off to a great start. If you haven't doneso already check for the following shows

Commander-In-Chief
Everybody Hates Chris
E-Ring

Sorry, I can't think of anything "new" that held my attention on WB or CBS..however, I LOVE Neil Patrick Harris' (a/k/a Doogie Houser) character on the show "How I met your mother?" The show won't be around too long...but Neil as "Barney" is a scene stealer!!

Lastly, for those of you checkin' for THE TRUE HIPHOP...please pick up "The Minstrel Show" by Little Brother...it's a cult classic people!!!

The man who just learned what "grout" was 1 year ago today...

B. Holcomb