This guy is pretty gangsta

1992-present day:

In High School and/or college I respected this man's game. The guy is a field general. I've seen him convert many-a-4th down chances...& if there was 1:42 left in the game, and I need a chance to score to win the game; hate it or love it, I probably want Brett Favre w/ the ball. In 3 maybe 4 words: he was/is clutch. But I never really cheered for him; w/ the exception of Super 32 where the Pack lost to Broncos (you know this is the game that contained the play of John Elways putting his helmet down and going for those extra 3 yards...you know the last clip they always show when they run Elway's career?). Oh, I also rooted for this guy during his role in "Something About Mary" (BTW, I still crack up everytime Dom (played by Chris Elliot) says "Mary! You didn't tell me Brett was Bre..tt...Fav--ahhvarah)

August-December 2005:

Okay, so in 2005, the Pack had arguably one of their worse seasons in sometime. Hurricane Katrina hit around labor day, and ravaged some parts of Brett Favre's homeland, Their star wideout Javon Walker got hurt in the first game, they were losing running backs like the Yankees lose games to the Devil Rays (btw, PEACE TO SAMKON GADO...you helped my fantasy team win another superbowl this past season!), lastly Mike Sherman got fired...I mean it was just all bad for the Pack. After the season, Brett Favre made a comment to "a close source" indicating that the 2005 season maybe his last season as an NFL player...but will make an annoucement sometime during the offseason

The week of March 31st 2006:

During the week of March 31st, 2006, we still haven't heard any confirmation from Favre whether or not he's coming back. In an offseason that was full of moves such as Aaron Brooks going to the Raiders, Joey Harrington being cut, La'Roi Glover and Corey Chaveous going to the Rams, T.O. to the Cowboys...the Pack hasn't been able to make any significant moves, b/c they still don't know if Brett is coming back or not. When asked about it, this dude says

"I still haven't made a decision...I have a lot on mind to consider."

When countered w/ the question "Well Brett, you're expected to make a decision this coming Saturday (which btw was April Fools day) Brett replies

"It's not gonna come tomorrow...I won't have a decision...what are they gonna do..CUT ME!?!?"

COME ON MAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Now let me just say had T.O., Ray Lewis, or Warren Sapp said something to that effect, their names would be WORSE than mud!! But this is the media darling Brett Favre...who just told the Packernation "Will you stay off my back please? I will continue to hold you by the nutsack, and you'll get an answer when I'm ready"

Saturday am April 8th 7:50am CST: (Peace to my man CJ Spencer, turning 30 today)

As I wake up and prepare to cut my grass, I tune into NFL network and I see that "Brett Favre who was schedule to make a decision about his future w/ the NFL @ 8:30am EST, has pushed back the start time to 8am" COME ON MAN.

I'm starting to like this guy more and more...he not only has the Pack, but now the media by the nuts! I need to tune in

April 8th, 8:15am CST

Adam Schefter (of NFL Network) is doing his best job ad libbing as Brett Favre has STILL not came to the podium to announce his decision. At this point, I'm getting happy b/c it's unusually cold this am in Dallas (46 degrees...it was 92 degrees on April 7th). Brett, I can wait for you...let me fix me a bowl of Coco Krispies...DAMN we're out of milk!

8:22am CST

"...and here we are live in Tunsia, MS where Brett Favre is expected to make his decision" (as Adam Schefter leads into the live broadcast)

Some exec from Harrah's Casino says a couple of words, and then turns it over to Brett

"I don't wanna say nuthin'" Says Favre...as he puts his head down. OH SH** I think he's about to retire (I think to myself). Immediately you faintly hear a reporter's voice in the background

"Brett, today is the day where you are to make a decision as to whether or not you'll continue as the Green Bay Packers quarterback. Where are you on that decision?"

"NO CHANGE." says Favre. "I haven't made up my mind yet...and I don't know why all you guys came down here and wasted a trip." COME ON MAN!!!!!

(The remainder of the press conference has Favre repeating phrases such as:

"I want to be sure we have a better team"
"I enjoy spending time w/ my family"
"The media is a trip" (B. Holcomb paraphrase)
"and oh yea...let me explain what exactly the purpose of my foundation is" ).

Regardless of the fact that he has a point about the wasted trip (I mean really, I've never been there, but outside of Steve McNair, Trent Lott, George W. Bush a couple of ex-students from Jackson State University, and that chick that played Denzell's love interest in the movie "Mississippi Masala" , I've never heard anything positive about Mississippi).

But dude...does this guy realize his team can't move forward until they know if their franchise kid is coming back?? COME ON MAN!!!!

Brett, as I stated before: You are clutch. The Packernation needs you (believe me, one of my good friends at work is a true fan of the Pack, and your indeciveness is negatively impacting his productivity). Just make your mind Brett! Don't hold the Packernation hostage anymore!

All that aside Brett, your recent actions have slotted you as my #3 favorite NFL personality now:

5b. Marc Bulger- only b/c he never has anything to say in the post game interviews. It's borderline hillarious
5a. Herman Edwards- Great coach. But easily the king of the soundbite...I tell people that Herm is the reason ESPNnews televises the post game interview...LIVE. While damn near everyone quotes: "YOU PLAY...THE GAME...TO WIN...HELLO!?!?!!?" My fav was Herm's response to this:

Coach Edwards, what is your response in lieu of the recent attacks that took place on September 11th, being in New York city...what would you say?"
Herm: GO TO CHURCH!!! BE W/ YOUR FAMILY, BE WITH YOUR SPIRITUAL LEADER!!! DON'T ASK ME...JUST PRAY ABOUT IT!" *AHEM* i continue w my list:

4. Randy Moss- easily the most country cat in the NFL
3. Brett Favre- for reasons stated above
2. Ray Lewis- Have you really listened to this guy? He drops some gems (knowledge for my non hip hop compliant readers)
1. Chad Johnson- He's on the NFL network right now (as they are resuming their regularly scheduled program). The guy is hillarious! In addition to his TD celebrations, he had me last year when he had the lamentated sheet of "Who can stop #85?"

oh damn...Chad just made the following statement "How is it that me & D'Angelo Hall cannot be on MNF together this year? We are what America wants to see...because we're going to give it our all. My entire workout in the offseason is dedicated to D'Angelo Hall, D, if you're listening...I love you but I got to have you...check this out: if me and D'Angelo Hall were in a phone booth...he couldn't touch me!"

COME ON MAN!!!!!!!!!!!

okay, i'm off to mow the lawn now

Still trying to understand the entire hook to the 1992 classic entitled "The Crossover" by EPMD,

B. Holcomb

P.S. As I'm still laughing to myself about Herm Edwards & Chad Johnson, I may have to compile a list of all time greatest soundbites (that I can remember)